"When You Get Tired Learn To Rest, Not Quit" - Banksy
Raise your hand if you've ever felt so completely and utterly overwhelmed by work, constant notifications from the online world, even just life in general, that you've wanted to shut yourself away from the world, live in your PJs and hide in your bed for a few days...🙋🏼♀️
I’ve recently been in a state of semi-hiding and I felt so inspired, by basically feeling totally crap, that I wanted to write a something about learning to stop, to rest and recoup.
You know the drill.. grab a snack and get ready for my top tips on how to rest your mind, body and soul and regain some control over your life!
When I became self employed I realised very quickly that you're never truly off the clock.
Let me guess.. you've felt it too? It is totally normal I promise you it is.
I used to make sure I was getting back to every comment and enquiry straight away. I would work crazy hours, sometimes 14 hour days, to fit people in! This was all fine and dandy when I was building my business and I had the time to do all this but now that my days are full it can get really overwhelming, leaving me exhausted, burnt out and more often than not bed bound for a few days.
Not only does it impact my business and my clients but it takes its toll on my family and friends too because I’ll become a cranky bitch and get snappy 😂
These are some of the ways that, I've found, have transformed my working and social life to give a much better balance. I'm not going to say perfect but it's a damn sight better than how it used to be. It all kinda circles around learning how to switch off, your phone, your mind, your guilt as a business owner, to really make the most of your life.
Learn To Say No
This is a biggie!
I am happy to announce that I now work to my set hours. I never used to! I was forever adding extra appointments in, working until 10pm/11pm at night and don't get me wrong I do still bend over backwards for my clients because I appreciate their custom, their love and support for me and my business but there has to be a cut off point. I think sometimes people forget that I have a life 😂 (not in a nasty or ignorant way) but I'm not a robot. Behind the screen, past the lashes, I am a normal gal. A human being made of flesh and blood and as much as I would loove to have super human powers, I don't.
I am not Wonder Woman (but how cool would that be?!) 🦹🏼♀️💪🏼
Learn to say "No", it's okay to say no, you are allowed to say no. Remember that this is your life, your business and you get to choose. You have the right to choose! Set your own rules! 🙅🏼
Manage Your Time
Once you've got your set hours in place and are sticking to them, make sure that you're blocking out time throughout your working day for your admin and to get shit done.
I love going to work, I love what I do and I am, admittedly, slightly obsessed with my job BUT I also like to go home.
I do really try to make sure that I'm not doing anything too work related at home.
I'll always block out slots in my day while I'm in the studio that gives me the time to get things done like replying to messages, admin/paperwork, helping my students, creating social media content and business planning (the list goes on) which will then leave my evening wide open to do whatever I want to do.. like snuggle my dog, pay my hubby some attention, maybe have a bubble bath and a glass of wine.. 🧖🏼♀️🍷
You might want to write a daily or weekly To Do list so that you can plan how you're going to manage your time efficiently.
Banish the guilt that you feel when you can't get back to your clients immediately.
Depending on how busy I am it can take me 24 - 48 hours to respond.
I've found that clients don't mind waiting for you to reply. Yes! Believe it or not they don't expect a reply within 0.5 seconds of them clicking SEND.
If anything, it shows how busy you are.. and why are you busy? Because you're sought after and damn good at what you do girl!! 👏🏼
Think of it this way, if you were the client would you prefer to wait for an appointment for an amazing set of lashes or to have the salon you've contacted squeeze you in the same day for a rushed, substandard set... I know which I'd choose!
Head over to your Pages app for Facebook > tap the Tools box (bottom right corner) > Settings > Messaging > Instant reply > Write an automated message letting clients know you'll get back to them soon. This will give you a bit of wiggle room for responding.
If you have an online booking system this will take a HUGE weight from your shoulders.
It wasn't until 4 years into business that I changed to a booking system and although it took me a bit of time to get my head round it at first, it has massively helped me manage my time. The fact that clients can easily book, cancel, change, rearrange their appointments without waiting for me to reply makes it so much easier for me!👌🏼👩🏼💻
Once you get your head round managing your daily routine you'll find it so much easier to find time to relax because it will become a part of your day.
A Change Of Scenery
In October, myself, my hubby David and our Staffie Zak, had our first holiday of 2019. We explored the East Coast and stuffed our faces with Fish + Chips and Ice Cream (seriously though my jeans wouldn't fasten when I got home🤦🏼♀️)
We went for long walks on beaches, relived our childhood memories in the penny arcades and spent our evenings in our PJs watching movies, eating cake and doing jigsaws in a cozy caravan.
Not your typical relaxation holiday I guess. Don’t get me wrong I would have loved a sun, sand and as much all inclusive Sangria that I could possibly stomach kinda holiday but our fur baby Zak is getting to be an old boy now and we hate leaving him - plus he adores the seaside! 🐶🌊
Having times like this to look forward to, to be in a different 4 walls and a chance of scenery can do wonders for your mind. For me, looking out at the sea clears my head. Especially at the coast where the glare of artificial lights are at a minimum, you can look up at the sky at night and see the bazillions of stars and the Universe so bright and clear. It reminds me how incredible the world is. It allows me to reconnect and slow down my brainwaves. It reminds me how lucky I am 😌🙏🏼
Booking a holiday, even a short break away with your loved ones will give you something to look forward to. Where you can switch off and reconnect with yourself and those around you.
There's A World Beyond Your Screen
Now I'm not saying I'm addicted to my phone (I'm sure the hubs would disagree on that one 🤭) but it's rare that it's away from me for a long period of time. When I got to the coast my phone was switched to silent, went in my bedside draw and that is where it stayed.. all week. Okay, I checked it every other day just to make sure there wasn't an emergency but I didn't open my phone, no scrolling, nothing.
I can't tell you how great it felt. Took me a day of patting my back jeans pocket, like the woman from the Asda advert, looking for it and forgetting it was in the draw but after that I forgot all about it.
While we were away we visited the seaside town of Whitby and found a pub called The Jolly Sailor. Small, oldie worldie little place with a roaring open fire in the main room and it was incredibly cheap for a round 😉🍻
Now the reason I mention The Jolly Sailor is that this pub really got me thinking as it has a very strict policy in place..
That's right! No phones, Ipads, Laptops, Tablets, NO TECHNOLOGY! If you needed to use your phone you had to go outside.
Sitting in The Jolly Sailor instantly transported me to a time where the whole reason you were at the pub in the first place was to socialise!
I suppose we can lose sight of real life through social media if we aren't carful. Gaining Likes and Followers, striving for that 'perfect' online presence, scrolling through Instagram and Facebook, scrolling and scrolling and scrolling until you've almost forgotten why you wanted to check FB or Insta in the first place, realising you’ve been scrolling, double tapping and liking for 3 hours.. 😶
Stop for a sec...
what about your presence in LIFE?!
your actual life, the here and now...
There is a lot more to life and to you as person than some random stranger liking your pictures and posts..
The feeling you get when a post gets a lot of likes, I’m not going to lie, a great feeling! But there really is so much more to life!
I noticed this week that Instagram has started hiding the number of likes, normally visible on posts, in hope to depressurise the platform, make it less of a competition and to reduce anxiety and social comparisons. Maybe this will help our addiction?
If you cant help but ‘check in’ then limiting your screen time may help!
I'm an Apple gal so I'm going to explain how to find this on an iPhone.
Settings > Screen Time (super easy!)
I LOVE this!! It gives you a real idea of how much you're using your phone, what apps you're using the most, how long you've used them for each day, each week (that scares the bejeebers outta me!)
Click 'See All Activity'... I'll give you a moment to be shocked here.. go ahead..
From here you can see how many notifications you get a day on each app, how many times you've picked up your phone, how long you've spent using each app and so much more!
You'll be able to set downtime (no notifications), limit your app usage and my fave, Do Not Disturb. Turning Do Not Disturb on will silence all calls AND notifications for total radio silence! No longer will you wake at 3am with your phone pinging away with messages asking if you have an appointment for 9am that same morning! Oh believe me.. this happens all. the. time. 😐
Have a play around with these settings, get a good understanding of what you're using your phone for and from there you will learn how to reduce your screen time - watch how it changes your life!
Try positive thinking and practise positive actions. Soon you will start to radiate positivity from every part of you. Even on your days off, try doing something where you can switch off completely. You could go for a walk, sit with a cuppa and lose yourself in a book, have a candle lit bubble bath even try a 10 minute meditation guide - whatever will help you to slow down and just be.
Spend time with your loved ones, your family, your friends.
The art of Manifestation is a magical thing and I could bang on about this forever... but that’s for another blog 😉
This change in mindset will change your world🙏🏼
So I hope this blog has helped and that some of you can connect with it.
As we head into ‘silly season’ make sure you’re taking time to take care of you.
Until next time..